Having now completed ten years of the pastorate I have counseled countless couples going through various degrees of marriage difficulties. Having studied, read and prepared over these years has lead me to compile the following list of questions which I always use. This is a fluid list – I may add to it at any time. Perhaps these questions will bring value to any relationship well before one needs to meet with a counselor.
1) If my marriage was good tomorrow, how would I know?
2) What effort am I putting into my marriage to make it stronger?
3) In what ways do I complement my spouse?
4) Is your spouse aware of the needs you have and how to meet them?
5) Everyone knows what they would like to change in their spouse – but what would your spouse like for you to change?
6)What is the most recent positive thing you have done for your spouse?
7) What is the dream you had for your marriage and how does it relate to today? Was is realistic to begin with?
8) Do you understand God’s view of marriage? Genesis 2:18-25, Ephesians 5:23-33, Ephesians 5:22-33
A good review of these questions from time to time will help keep your marriage on track. Taking time to evaluate your marriage and your personal dedication to your spouse will go a long way towards spiritual success in your marriage.
